Girl Poet Volume 3
Love is fleeting, and forgetting is so long…
Deep Seas…
Oceans apart
Drifting toward our hearts
Calm seas
Approaching a shimmering sunset
Formerly a dehydrated shallow turquoise
Smooth and deep is how you’ve had me
You, a vast and furious endless sapphire
A distant dark blue that is hungry and relentless
Choppy, turbulent, majestic & everlasting within me
Rich, supernatural, a great uncharted course we’ve sailed
Our love
Infinite unexplored blue-black endless liquid that pulses through our veins
A perilous stormy battle waged against us
Mighty waves sought to drown our soul
The unseen depth below the surface allowed us to survive once more
Hypnotic peaceful, mysterious merciless passion bubbled to the shore
The universe eternally unquiet blessed us with limpid pools of azure aqua
Shells on sandbar
You, a warm swell that crests white caps over me
Wet hard, salty, savage, tempestuous wildly boundless engulfs floating crystalline
The pacific purple blue meets the Atlantic cool arctic
Our ambrosial future is limitless
Tide pools of pearls in clams
Velvet sugary soft powder surf
Opalescent cerulean coast
A cobalt gulf of aquamarine
No more gritty coral and pebbles in the sand
Only royal indigo lagoons where a Merman & Mermaid swim afar
Past sunken ships and stinging saltwater
That has vanished beneath the ocean floor
Wishes upon starfish, teal marine, golden strand beneath our feet
Endless love within our reach©
Twin Flames Fairytale…
When the world was full of wonder high above the clouds
There lived Thunder & Lightening
Together they shared a MAGNETIC bond.
They understood that their power was higher when balanced.
Therefore, it was logical to use his AC to her DC whenever possible.
And they charged & recharged quite frequently.
What they shared was voltaic, like pouring boiling water on ice.
The legend foretold that Lightening is the sparks that fly when her love skips over the sky,
While the rousing, thrilling Thunder is the sound of his beating heart that pounds heavy and sharp.
Together they caused their blinding light and deafening crack to bring the beautiful explosions we call storms.
Look to the skies as Thunder & Lightening happen at approximately the same time, Lightening travels faster than Thunder, even though it is moving at supersonic
Speeds thus we see the flash before we hear the roar.©
My Dream…
I dream of arms that hold me tight
All through the night
Lips that find my nape
And linger there
Warmth that can only come from divine caring
Lovers that hold sharing in high regard
However near or far
I dreamt of you
This man that finally came
For this woman’s heart©
Memento…
All I have left of love is pain
And I’m going to hold on for dear life
Because it’s all I have left of you.©
You…
One day
Very soon
I’m never going to stop
Kissing you
Hugging you
Making love to you
Giving all of myself
To you
Me
And Us©
You…
for me, are
Laughter & Intelligence, Vigor & Stamina, Balanced & Fair, Logical & Just,
Gentle Sweetness, Passionate ardor that never cools
Molten Lava that covers every inch of me,
Talent & Virtue, Courage & Potency, and Amorous affection. A list does not exist, as there are never enough words
to express what my heart feels
and what my eyes see in you©
Mending…
I was the eye
Of the needle
And He threaded me
One slow stitch at a time©
Sustenance…
Every day will feel like only one step away from you
Into my future without you
I will always feel the urge to circle right back
It will require all my strength to remind myself
That no matter what
You wanted me to leave
I will always know
You were afraid of the power of my love
You will live with that
Until this lifetime is over©
The Truth…
All the things I will live through without you here
Men who I will choose to surrender myself to
To heal my obliterated semblance of a heart
That has not beaten the same since your departure
Smiles, laughter that are false only to I
Who knows the truth
That the half of me that was once whole
Is filled with sorrow that never ceases
Somewhere we walk in different directions
No longer on the same path
All the while the missing piece that no one else can replace
The tang of my tears burns my soul
Painfully needing what I cannot have
Praying I will see him before the last memory fades©
The Dream…
You were my miracle
Sharp and true
Forever
I waited to look into your eyes
Always
Seeking the other half to my whole
You, allowed me to be your woman
To your man
Wanting
To be joined with you
From the first second©
Stonedeaf…
All of what I feel is evident and immersed in my spirit
I know with certainty he loves me
Those three words may never be spoken
But I hear them loudly
Decibels hitting a range that cannot be measured with any ancient or modern technology
But I know
What I know
This is enough
Enough for now©
Epiphany…
Our flames of conflagration
Ebb and flow
Sheath us in its heat
His hands cannot seek out enough of my body
Nor do I want them to
Thrusting deep
Then deeper
Engaging my bliss©
Highborn…
My bliss shouts your name when I don’t want it to
My Queen despairs
There will never be another who will own her red carpet
The way your King did
The drawbridge will not lower for just any royal scepter
Yours was unique and suited your royal highness
The days of being your Reina have long since gone
Mi Rey where is my heart supposed to go?
365 days later
My soul refuses to travel anywhere without yours
Affliction…
There is no waiting for you
Only suffering by you
The bittersweet agony of silence
The muted love that never surfaced, no matter how much it tried
Memories on repeat forever
Put an end to my adoration of your presence
Tell me I’m not the only one who dies a little more as each day goes by
Unfulfilled desires that are now strangled go hard
Rearing their romantic heads with cries of love that scream perfection
A pairing so unique that it is par to none
Bleeding prevails
I am anemic once more
As your iron once supplied, my nourishment is denied
Surgery will not sustain my heartbeat
Lungs long for your special oxygen
To inhale, to feel your joy again
Is the only antidote©
Intimacy…
I wasn’t fucking you
I was loving you
Will anyone else
Be who I was to you
One day
You will tell me your answer©
Empowering Poetry by The Roaring Truth
Poetry Book Volume 2
This Special Man…
You came from nowhere
With that smile that could
Light a hundred cities
And eyes that sparkled brighter than diamonds
In two winks you melted my heart
And so I felt the rush of emotions
That hit me like a runaway locomotive
With such a magnetic force
I was completely drawn to you
The strength in your touch
Brought me to my knees
The child-like wonder of you
Gave me that first twinge of love
Your goodness held me hard & fast
Trusting was more wonderful than I had imagined
So I fell,
Fell head over heels
With this special man who loved me
And never let me go. ©
4/27/99
All in a Day…
Let us hope that we never wake from this dream
Where our hearts, minds and bodies seem to float amongst the angels in heaven.
Let me always hold you captivated with my touch, while you keep me guessing with your smile.
Your voice, Oh, what lovely melodies ring through my ears
My lips, soft and moist long to kiss your very soul
Let us absorb every memory of lovers united, so that we never forget the first moment
We bonded and became “one”
Dreams really do come true, Me –n- You. ©
5/4/99
Us
A love that burns with a white hot flame
How can we begin to tame
A fire that cannot be extinguished
With desires and needs that go unrelinquished
A meeting of the minds
Where our thoughts and hearts unwind
To give and to receive
I hope you never leave. ©
5/7/99
Longing…
Your fingertips on the small of my back
How you never seem to lack
Love and compassion
Shown in the most sincerest fashion
Your touch on my body, how intoxicating
words and deeds that are reciprocating
Missing you takes it toll
My aching heart longs to be consoled
I feel as if I am dying
But I am wrong
For I am truly flying©
5/17/99
Healing Words
Be sure to take a pill to stop the chill
Drink hot tea and you will see
Your throat will be soothing and you’ll soon be cooing
To comfort your pain I will tell you again
How tender loving care will soon be there. ©
5/20/99
Sweetness
Nails that scratch your back
Hair that tickles your face
Legs to wrap around your waist
Arms to hold you tight
Love that runneth over
Wishes on a four leaf clover©
6/1/99
Lustful
Arms to hold you
Legs to enthrall you
Hearts race
And beat as one
Soft yet hard
To you I must disarm
My walls made
Of shadows of broken promises
Breasts as full as the moon
You chest, a shelter, my cocoon
Longings, stirrings and wrinkled sheets
You & I making love
Nothing else could ever be so sweet©
6/1/99
Deepest Ocean
The seas send waves crashing
Like the love that is everlasting
Prevailing are the sands of time
To which you were sent to be mine
Your eyes are of liquid ebony
Please do not put an end to me
Leave not your footprints on my heart
Where lovers soon depart
I have faith in the rolling tides
That soon you will confide
Your feelings that whisper thoughts of what’s really in your heart©
June 3, 1999
My Wish
Someone once told me
If you wish upon a star
You shall go far
So I’ll wipe the tear drops from your eyes
How can I disguise
I have bruised your heart from the inside out.
I need to let you know
That you’ve given and you’ve shown
Actions speak louder, words need not be spoken.
Please excuse my behavior
I am “Oh” so unfamiliar with containing
My feelings that flow with the intensity of a waterfall.
My wish is to make you happy
Where your laughter can be
A mirror that reflects one soul to another©
June 5, 1999
A Quarter of a Century
It’s that time of the year
When age seems like your biggest fear.
When wrinkles start to appear
From just out of no where.
So take it in stride
Your wisdom will provide.
A source of strength
Of some immeasurable length.
For you are not really older
It’s just your endeavors are getting bolder.
So reach for the stars
And may all your birthday wishes go far! ©
June 7, 1999
The Crush
I watched you from afar
Like the moon who watch the stars
Though you never knew I fell
I was hypnotized by your spell
Your walk, your talk
Had me moved from the start
My eyes remained silent and unseen
In that place where love’s serene
How could I conceal
You made me feel so real
I longed for your touch
To me, it would mean so much
How were you to know
My heart was scared to show
That the mere thought of your face
Made me tremble with disgrace
So I blew my crush a kiss
And hoped that he wouldn’t miss
That in my kiss he’d find
A love to shine for all time. ©
June 7, 1999
Muy Caliente’
Throbbing, Pounding
Bodies collide
Moist & Wet
How can we forget
Climax after Climax
Reeks with shame
Control is lost
And it will surely cost
To stroke, to suck
Can’t wait till we fuck! ©
June 10, 1999
“The President takes charge”
Watch and plan
And see if you can
Delegate to your team
So that a member cannot ream
Your authority, which upholds
The group’s strength that unfolds
With each meeting of the minds
Your intuition will incline
How the company will succeed
And you’ll soon be in the “green” ©
June 11, 1999
I am sad
With wishes on a Lad
Who has long since, forgotten
Feelings that were sought in
A heart so full of joy
With hopes that were so coy
How can I make him see
I’m scared that he will flee
To the once who is more acceptable
Instead of the one who is more object able
Tell me he is strong
And can right whatever wrongs
Because now she needs to know
What it is that makes him show
Why she’s been picked from all the rest
To complete his heart the best©
June 23, 1999
“Lover’s Illness”
Feed a fever
Starve a cold
When they made you,
They broke the mold
Aches and pains
Drive you insane
Take some time to rest
In your warm & cozy nest
Cures and spells
Just trying to wish you well©
June 25, 1999
Autum
So, so sad
It seems I’ll only be a “fad”
In today
Out tomorrow
Parting is such sweet sorrow
Promises of “October”
How these lines roll over
With grief and disenchantment
I feel like I can’t fit
Hand & glove
I only wanted your love©
June 28, 1999
“This is for you”
Eyes that hold me in one glance
Feeds the flames of love will chance
Tomorrow’s sorrows will never live
As long as feelings always give
You lit the darkness along the way
Can I ever find the words to say
A knight you are, sweet and true
Your queen I’ll be to start anew©
July 13, 1999
“Open wide and say ahhh”
Drills & Novocain
Drive the brain insane
The dentist wants to be your friend
So pearly whites don’t transcend
Lean back and close your eyes
How you will surmise
Teeth falling form your mouth
Your courage flees and goes south
For just a little while
You will “rinse” and then smile
No cavities they will find
Your x-rays were just fine
So now you’re on your way
To live another day©
July 26, 1999
“Memories of Us”
Hand in love
Fits like a glove
Bedazzled eyes flecks of jewels
Inhale breath, rose petals on my bed
To hold in moments weak with passion
To have seconds stole in action
Exchanged touched kisses our skin
Constant sweet excitement is the sin©
August 6,1999
“A Thank You”
A night such as ours
Seems to pass within hours
Soon you’ll be out of my touch
Missing you way too much
Heart tingles, renewed love mingles
Written on the stars
Moons collide with ours
A chance to the heavens we will fly
Nothing can compare
Just you & I ©
August 20, 1999
“Soul mates”
Your scent sends tingles
Which make my senses mingle
With the sweet sounds of love
Chimes of rhymes to melt our lobes
Tears to fall on your nose
However far you climb
I will always be behind
The man who stole my heart
With sorrows to impart
I am strong and I am free
And you will soon see
That though it was a gamble
Our hearts were more than a hand full©
August 28, 1999
“Strong & Kind”
Breathing softly in my ear
Heart pounds, holds you near
Hearts and minds
A moment in time
Sun filled day’s starry nights
Hold my hand I’ll hold you tight
Laughter, tears,
Sorrows, & fears
Ecstasy is so dear©
August 28, 1999
“Viva de Rosarito”
Make the plans
Pack the bags
“Lobsters & steaks”
to fill our plates
Sand & Surf
“Tequila con Margarita’s”
4 nights of fireworks galore
Waves crashing on the shore
For it’s the “Babies”
With the Oldest
A weekend filled with love
At its boldest
“Oh, la Que pa so”
La Paloma is the goal©
September 7th, 1999
“You’re in Check!”
Checkmate
It’s much too late
Rook takes pawn
Queen takes knight
Uphold the Kingdom
Your opponent has wisdom
Bishop diagonally slides
Your pawn tries to hide
To kill or not to kill
The opposition’s at your will©
September 14, 1999
Lover Come Hither
Touched my soul, imprints my heart
Vacancy, missing, stealing time
Salt in tears, awakens my fears
Pain shadows, shame follows.
Lust shares love nor you or I
Hear nothing but heavy sighs.
Come hither Lover don’t wither
No fools or lies under my watchful eye.
Lovers return sheets cry vengeance
Moans of sweet pleasure hold the legend©
September 27, 1999
“Your Love”
It’s timeless
A careless whisper on my shoulder
A gift tucked under my pillow
Sweet melodies from your soul
A smile that melts my heart
Lips that find my tears
It’s as high as the heavens
As strong as the sea
Me pleasing you
You pleasing me©
October 18, 1999
“For The programmer”
My heart clings to yours
While vacancy seems to ignore
The light less powerful still shines
While our rays still intertwine the mind
I am crushed by the touch of your hand
Swoon me away to far & precious lands
Knights ride gallantly to maidens in distress
How you seem to undress
My body with your eyes
Hide lies come sweet tides
Come share my bed
Where chivalry churns my head
Climb to the ladder of my soul
To enter the window of the life you hold©
November 4, 1999
“Ode to Phantom of the Opera”
Love bays sweet moonshine calls
Corridors echo patience down lonely halls
Wise Am I to virtuous deeds masked in vain
Yearnings, longings fondle my shame
Christine fears the Phantom nears
Lingering sorrows rule the heart’s fears
A long-awaited fantasy cast away
Shatters mirrors of music lost in haze
To cherish & behold spells are bold
Never again will he wear his mold
Our souls will whisper some long retreat
The notes will captivate to share our heat©
December 6, 1999
“Our 1st Trip to Las Vegas”
A buffet that almost broke the bank
With a platter full of roast veal shank
A quarter here a twenty lost there
Made our wallets empty with despair
Our fantasies of Italy came true
When our eyes feasted on Bellagio anew
Monte Carlo is where we grinded till dawn
Unaware of how we’d awaken with such a yawn
We adventured on the island of treasure
To win toys & treats for our kids to pleasure
It came and went quicker than we knew
Soon we landed in Orange County like we flew©
December 13, 1999
“Blue Mood”
Flies, time
Lies, shine
Faces hide Alibi’s
A moment nears
Gestures unfold sneers
Strangers pose leers
Woe is me
Blue is she
Who’s tears fall on me©
Volume 1
Heartbroken,
Over my Heart ©
A book of Poetry
About Hearts that break but always mend
Author: Elizabeth Lorraine
Forward:
To every reader who finds my words comforting
And peaceful place. We truly all have had a broken
Heart.
Dedicated:
To every man I’ve ever loved and lost,
without them I never would have been
inspired to write.
For: Aria Jade Halstrum
“ My Tiger Baby.”
The First Date...
Nov 5, 1995
You never know when it will come,
that first wink across the table.
It makes a statement, hey come notice me.
I’m sitting right in front of you.
Awkward moments combined with nervous hands.
Apparently, I find myself leaning forward.
Who will speak first, him or I ?
Long pauses accompanied by an inclination to wink back.
I am terrified, will he see through my actions?
Can I attain the same attention he seeks from me?
What humor there is
by falling into those ever so famous roles of two strangers
enjoying a private moment.
No one is likely to know what will transpire
but one thing is certain, it will be important to both.
For one should not underestimate thee effects
of such a little gesture.
It seems it can make or break worlds
between two people. ©
Your last Curtain call
Oct 30, 1995
You’ve been here,
I can smell the scent of you on my pillow.
Let me look for some clue or hint,
that you’ve loved me and then gone away.
To think of you now allows me to free myself,
to all my emotions of you then.
When loving was simple and easy.
However, there is nothing quite simple
about the way you chose to love now.
There were some bits of you left to ponder over
but I’ve blown them all away.
You see, there is nothing left to tie me to the memory,
for I have forgotten how to love you. ©
Perfect Vision
Oct 18, 1995
You look so good to me,
from far away
like a diamond in rough
At this distance I can see no flaws
I am at ease
And at this moment
serenity
Takes the place of tears
Something inside of me now
That is wiser
Tells me
Love is no longer blind
You still look good to me
From where I stand
but were you
Ever truly good to me ?
Upclose
You were not
The masterpiece
I made you out to be
Most every expectation I had
Did not materialize
I looked at you
But never actually saw you
and if I stand before you now
I can see you were not what I was in love with
You were just a made up image
Of what I wanted you to be ©
Lost in Love
Sept 23, 2001
Beyond a blue sky
there was you, my shinning star
and through your eyes
I could see things in a new perspective
every hue in the rainbow,
was a glorious sight to my eyes
the sound of children’s laughter
gave me so much joy & excitement
if you could only know
what my life was like before you were in it
there was a pain and emptiness
from longing to be with someone who cared
the tingle I feel whenever I hear your voice
cannot easily be explained
I only know this
you make me so happy
I never knew it could be this wonderful
the honesty of your affection goes right to my heart
from that first moment
you looked into my eyes
I should have known
my world would never be the same
I don’t know how you found me
but I’m so glad you did ©
My Space
Dec 23, 1995
Oh, how I enamor the darkness
it cradles me in it’s arms
and comforts me like nothing else I know
there can be no threat or harm to my emotions here
I can hide myself away
and my facial expressions are visible to know one
I allow the blackness to envelope me
and the warmth it provides
keeps me safe in it’s bosom
every moment of everyday I wait for it’s return
without it I am subjected to being in this fish bowl
where all around strangers cast glances of judgment
That first second I see the light make it’s exit
I sense my mind relax and pressure escape me
the empty void that is soon to follow is where I live
In that place that is most familiar to me
there is solace and peace in the truth that is spoken
here I am not a winner nor a loser
here I am just what I see
and what I see is nothing ©
To My Long Awaited Husband
MAR 13, 1996
Only few days have passed
and already I feel as if we’ve been together for a life time
you emerged from the hazy mist
and I could see you were everything I ever wanted.
Deep down in the far reaches of my heart,
there is something you should know.
Not one day will pass that I won’t shower you,
with Love, Affection and Endless Devotion.
To me, you are that “diamond in the rough”.
There you were,
right in front of me and oh how you shined.
The lord then whispered in my ear
and told me you were the one.
Since then,
everyday with you has been a little piece of heaven
and every night the 4th of July.
No matter what happens, please don’t ever forget
You are the one,
The man I want to spend the rest of my life with.
Love Forever,
your Long Awaited Wife ©
Carry on Bag
Feb 26, 1996
Some men walk into our lives
and when they wander off,
they have no idea if the imprint they’ve left on our hearts.
We probably have the fingerprints
of every lover who ever wronged us.
The baggage we carry is a heavy load
and even though we hardly need it,
we manage not ever to leave one piece behind.
We take our 20 piece set everywhere.
To us it signifies time and energy
something we choose not to forget about.
How could we
with every man we were molded and sculpted a little more.
Until now,
we were just waiting for the right man to come along
and turn us into his version of a work of art.
We never realized,
we, ourselves were the long awaited masterpiece. ©
Soon
June 9, 1996
Soon
you will find
though I wasn’t your perfect vision of loveliness
I have a heart of gold
and can love with a fierceness
I can make you tremble with my eyes
and touch you with my soul
To show you a place that has no boundries or limits for love.
Soon
you will see
that even in the most beautiful of faces
and the most perfect of bodies
that every person has some flaws
however so slight
Our physical beings hold no importance, love is found in our hearts alone.
Soon
I will know
though it hurt, how easy it was to let you go
to find a real heart that was deserving of my own
to feel no regret or loss
Because a love without imperfections doesn’t even exist
except in your own mind. ©
The Rapture
Jan 20, 1997
Your here
In my thoughts
but no where are your strong arms to hold me
To feel your warm breath
Against my neck would be so enchanting
to be so absorbed in each other that anything else pales in comparison
I would ask who you are
However, I knew from my first glance
that you were a man who could bring many to their knees
Instead you chose me to capture
I delight in the thought of knowing
I, too have drawn you in and under my spell
I see my very touch brings your heart one step close to mine
So take me
And let me bask in all of yours charms
while you seek to possess the rapture that is mystery of me
Only we know
That in this world and the here after
our love endures and prevails long after dawn ©
Let Me
Jan 16, 1996
Let me feel the rays of your light
shine down upon my face, the warmth of your sun has embraced me
you reached for me and I could not turn away
I am whole again
Let me say my heart
has been enslaved by your gentle touch
your presence has awaken me from slumber
I am alive again
Let me soar
higher than I ever imagined
with you here to walk beside me
take my hand, all the world is at our fingertips
I am in love again
Let me show you
there is nothing like you and I
a love that is forever boundless and free
I am now one, with you ©
One Rainy Night
Dec 12, 1995
I hear rain fall against my window
and I can still feel your wet kiss on my lips.
In a dimly lit room I sit feeling confused,
Where did I go wrong ? What was my crime ?
Why was I punished for giving my heart ?
was I wrong to dream of you and I someday.
I wanted so desperately to be everything to you
In reality, I was nothing.
It is painful to see how you’ve moved on so effortlessly
I ask myself, “how has he managed to let go ?”
Look at me, I can barely get through an hour without thinking of his face
I was a fool, I can see your emotions played no part
I must have been in love all by myself.
Every moment I tell myself there will be a life without you
however, I am not truly convinced.
how can I breath without you here beside me ?
I have been shattered from the inside out.
You will never again touch me
like the tears falling down my cheek.
My only comfort is the rain
and soon the storm will pass
just like the memory of you will. ©
My Song
Dec 10, 1995
When I was lonely, a bird came and perched on my shoulder.
It whispered the most beautiful melody
that still haunts me to this very day.
I knew not one lyric, but I could tell it was my theme song.
For the tune that was played brought on tears
and in that lovely music was all my pain.
I tried so hard not to listen but the story it told was about my life.
Heartache had followed me wherever I went.
I was never to understand why
but misery and unhappiness was my destiny
Love was for others and not for me
One day this bird flew away and left me with no trail of it’s existence
except, for a gentle hum of something familiar.
A sadness has fallen over me about the way it left though
and my intuition tells me I should listen for it’s return
Because one day soon I might hear a Love song. ©
Air Fans Fire
Feb 20, 1996
Ever since the very first day
I’ve been tipping your scales.
I wish I could apologize to you
But I’m not one bit sorry.
You see I’ve noticed how you’ve been pulled towards me
Because I in turn was pulled towards you.
No matter how hard we tried to hide it
From within it emerged and took us over.
You look at me and I look at you
And we both Know something is different.
It feels strange to be here now
Do we stand still or take the next step ?
I don’t know which way your scales are leaning
And though I’m scared, I’m very happy.
I know I never wanted to let on
But no one else has ever made me so nervous.
I felt like I hated you & loved you all at the same time
If only you knew all the while I wanted to touch you.
I’d give anything to know what your thinking right now
But as always I have no control over the future.
All I can do is hope and pray
You’ll decide to gently fan my fire. ©
Strength in Love
April 4, 1996
I have baskets full of hugs and kisses saved just for you
and If I leave petals of the most fragrant flowers
I know you will follow my trail.
There is nothing that can come between this love,
it has a strength unto itself.
When the most powerful of storms come it most surely will prevail.
You and I together are that link to that chain we never found until now
I don’t know if it will be a day, a month, or forever
but wherever you lead, I will not be far behind.
Please don’t ever stop uttering those three words
I waited all my life to hear and from now until the end of time
the strength of this love will have a power like none other. ©
Guardian Angels
Dec 12, 1995
I have someone that cares more than I do
I have someone that loves more that I do
I cannot see nor can I hear them but I know they are here
They exist not in my mind but in my spirit
I could be afraid but I have no fear of them
They are here to protect me but guide me they cannot
I walk alone on this road but I feel they are right beside me
I know not what direction I must go but I will never be lost
Fore my Guardian Angels will show me the way ©
Book of the Month
Dec 15, 1995
My dear sweet love,
can I ask one thing of you before you walk away from me ?
Look into my eyes
and tell me you don’t love me anymore.
Make it easy for me just once,
So that I may take all hope of ever having you and lock it away in the bottom of my heart.
I want to finally sleep without dreaming of you,
erase all these nagging thoughts of you coming back to me.
Do this for me,
So I can finally move on to close this book and end this chapter.
If you can’t, I can.
Farewell to you and all the heartache you brought,
as always, The End ! ©
Relationships Undated
In my mind it seems
no guarantees
just hopes and dreams
how soon time flies
only promises and lies
some of us will stay
while others will go
how was I to know
there was nothing left to show
we fall to fast
when we really want it to last
to sadly grow apart
then to mend a broken heart
only to feel alone
when nothing else has shown
that love however pleasurable
can never truly be measurable
with affairs such as these
its no wonder lovers fail with such ease ©
Someday
June 7, 1995
someday I will be over you
but now is not that time.
I hear a voice and feel a sweetness
and I ever faithfully turn to see if it is you.
I close my eyes and sense your presence is near
only to open them and find my imagination playing tricks on me.
I look and see you walking arm in arm with someone other than me
and like a bad habit, I still wish I could be her.
I know you brought me much sorrow and such unhappiness
but I long fiercely to be by your side.
I remember the first time you told me you’d never hurt me,
how I cried thousands of tears when your promise was broken
Sleeping without you now is a cruel fate
and those nights you laid next to me I felt more alone than ever.
I loved you with my heart soul and body
and I know now you couldn’t love me the same way.
Someday I will be over you
and I pray every night that time will come soon. ©
Secret Lover
July 15, 1995
I never thought I’d feel this way but I’m insane for you
all I can think about is you touching me, feeling you against my body.
How did this happen? One day you were my friend and the next my lover.
How I miss the scent of you, just to have you near me makes me feel safe.
I’m so hot and bothered, only your sweet love can relieve me of this torture
you have cast a spell over me, tell me what you need and I will be it.
Your thinking tells you I can have many but you’re the only one I want.
How can I make you see, you‘ve captured the very essence of me.
How can I ever return to who I was since you arrived and took me away.
How I wish you felt the same way, If not all will be forgotten between us.
You forever , will hold a special fascination for me
so until then I will hide amongst the shadows
and wait every night until you come for me, so that only I will know
you are my secret lover. ©
It’s Over Now
June 13, 1995
Why play the fool, when you can have something better
don’t you know how special you are ?
What’s gone is gone, there’s no wishing to go back
if they were all that they would still be here.
You’re the only one who knows your not missing much of anything now
No need to think someone is living a better life than you had
To those of you who wandered off without a regret
you should have recognized this, someone like me you’ll never find.
My farewell and best wishes to you all, you’ve chosen a different path
and for I, It’s time to move on to another love. ©
There Can Be Only You
May 26, 1995
All of my life
only you
will touch me
and my body will scream with ecstasy
others will love me
all my life through
only you
will I have a bond that will compare to nothing
everything about you
makes me insane with passion
only you
I will always crave
I’m so afraid
I will always love you this way
I know we will never again belong to each other
but in this way
we will always stay
only you
my true lover
there can be no other
what can I say
only you
In my arms is where you’ll lay. ©
Love’s Irony
May 15, 1995
One day you’ll look back and wonder what ever happened to that girl with the long black hair.
Is she still tall and beautiful?
Is she happy?
Is she in love with someone else?
How’s her life now?
All the while you will wonder if it was you she could have been with
I should have appreciated her
I should have listened more
I should have said I’m sorry those times I hurt her
maybe if I wasn’t so selfish we’d still be together.
Time has a way of making us forget our decisions, The phrase “if only”
has a way of lingering over our minds.
“If only” I had one more chance to try again it would be better this time.
I’ve learned so much about love since she’s been gone.
I guess love has it’s irony, your last statement is your answer to this dilema
“since she’s been gone”, she really had to leave before you fully understood.
How strange love is, you never know until they go
It’s okay though, take all your new found knowledge to the next relationship
so you’ll never have to say, “I wonder what ever happened to?” ©
I’m Sorry Babe
May 25, 1995
If I could change everything I‘ve did and said, I would in a minute.
How I just wanted to be with you,
you never had a clue, but I was so afraid to reach out to you and let you know.
How I’ve hurt you, it kills me to know I’ve caused you pain
let me make it up to you, come closer let me hold you next to me.
I have a secret to tell you, listen to me when I say
I love you, since the first time you touched my heart
I want you more than you could ever imagine.
I need you to tell me you feel the same
please don’t look into my eyes now and say it’s too late, I’ve made a mistake.
How I wish I hadn’t, all I have left to say is “I’m sorry babe.” ©
The Dreamer
May 10, 1995
A long time ago
There was a little girl
Who thought all of life
would be as wonderful as a warm summer day
Then the harsh realities of the world set in
how she was crushed by cruelties everyday society brought her way.
Her fairytale notions about love and life were far more romantic
then stories that of the princess and the frog.
She failed countless times of looking closely at others
who’s intent was far more manipulative then her own.
Even still she wouldn’t remove those rose tinted glasses
she saw things in others you only read about.
So with that, she took hope and faith and tucked it under her arm
and so she cheerily continued to walk her path
In search of pink dreams floating on a cloud. ©
Time
May 10, 1995
The clock beats ever so quickly
and there is no permanency of a strong love.
This ticking is pounding in my ears
and I can only envision my desires
I am suffocated by this clock I cannot control
In which way did I make my mistake?
I pray the hours will pass in slow motion
I have waited ever so patiently
The day has ended and subtlety slipped into night
and the affections of another fail to head my direction
The minutes and seconds are relentlessly seeking me
My motive has been to forge a bond time cannot erase
Even still I am unable to put a halt to the hands of fate and destiny
They will move about me whether I acknowledge them or not.
If I should live more than one lifetime
regret will forever rest on my shoulders
for I had the strength to hold true
but I never took love by the hand. ©
My Vision
May 7, 1995
One day I will walk arm in arm
with a man who will be my beloved
and in he, I shall have the peace & happiness
I never found in others before him
He will be strong and kind and when he gazes in my direction
I will see he’s the one I’ve waited for
In him I will experience the gentle art of giving and receiving
He will show me in endless ways how much he cherishes me and our love
There will not be a couple more perfect than us
others around us will see a powerful bond
Our nights and days will be filled with passion
with us there will be no limits for love
and from now until the end of time
I will walk arm in arm, my beloved and I. ©
I Have a Secret
May 5, 1995
There is something you should know, I fell in love
with a man, not an image.
Now you have made your exit, should I regret my effort ?
For awhile there was safety in numbers, you tried so hard not to but you cared
You fell too, didn’t you ? Who are you hiding from me or yourself ?
I would have given you the world, so it must have been you
You knew I wanted to share our hearts, I knew you couldn’t take the next step
So I let you go, now your facade has been broken
why did you run ? Did you think I was aiming the gun at your heart
My intent was not to hurt you but to love you
though you dodged my bullets like a pro, that reminds me that’s your style.
So if I should ever run into you again, there is something you should know
I had a secret for you... ©
Hide & Seek
May 4, 1995
Hello there old friend,
where have you been hiding ?
I didn’t know we were still playing our game
It’s seems I’ve been counting to ten for a lifetime.
Is it my turn yet ?
Shall you seek and then try to find me
I’ve been peeking at you
for along while now from behind a rainbow
I like the way we take turns with each other
You’re the only one I know that plays fair
You and I are like children
we love the excitement the chase brings
if you close your eyes now
and start at one, I will give you a run for your money
We both know I am better at hiding
then you are at seeking
Even though I do see something about you
I’ve never seen before
We haven’t played this in awhile
so if you should not find me, let me give you a hint
I’ve been right behind your shoulder all along
Sorry, I guess that means I win. ©
The Troops
May 2, 1995
My family unit
my father
I am of your flesh
and you have yet to comprehend who I am.
My mother
I am your first born
and you have been my witchdoctor and I your favorite doll.
My first sister
I have held your hand more than once
and you still have the ability to disappoint me tremendously.
My second sister
I am night and you are day
and between us there can be no common ground
My third sister
you are the baby girl and I am the oldest girl
and I look into your eyes and already I see your wounds
My only brother
I am a woman and soon you will be a man
and we only have one thing in common, I am the first and you are the last.
These are my allies, my troops
there can be only these correlations between us
cuts that won’t heal
bruises that don’t fade
and a sickness there’s no cure for
There is a bond
not one of love and admiration
but one based on anger and resentment.
I have made many attempts to go A-wall
but I am committed to finishing the war with them
Don’t think it’s because I enjoy it,
It is the only thing I’ve ever known ©
A Self-Portrait
April 18, 1995
I see a girl who until now didn’t always notice she was a woman.
She has felt enough pain for ten lifetimes and even though,
she is a survivor.
Though sometimes she has doubts, she is not afraid to be who she is.
If you look beyond her expression you can see beauty radiates from every aspect of her
She has finally arrived and there’s a sparkle about her
she knows whatever she touches can be turned to gold.
With every struggle she has learned strength is her best attribute
her stride will not be broken.
She knows love and life are synonymous; there are no limits to what she’ll give
She has done her research and is learning her lessons well
the best parts of her mind are growing and with expansion comes renewal.
She can affirm there is nothing about her life she would change.
She can see all of these things make-up her own unique loveliness.
That woman can look at herself now and say “I really love who you are!” ©
Old Ghosts
April 20, 1995
You would never know it but a long time ago I was hurt very much
by others who said they loved me but didn’t always act like it.
Many times I allowed myself to be trampled upon for the glory of love
I never realized how I damaged myself on the inside
The choices I made were not always healthy ones
If I give the impression of wearing a suit of armor
Please don’t take it personal It’s just my defensive side at work
I’ve yet to meet someone who I’ve given my heart to take it and hold it close to their own
I understand you don’t have to be this patient
But it would be a miracle if you could
Even though you might not be aware of it yet, I am well worth the wait ©
Whomever, You Are
April 18, 1995
Your like a mirage
Everytime I think I’m getting close to you
You vanish without any warning...
Your an illusion
My mind keeps playing over and over
Sooner or Later
I know before me you will unfold
Only this time
I want to get close enough to really reach out and touch you
I no longer want to imagine what my heart says you feel like...
If I could have one second
To hold your impression upon me
I know I could fill a lifetime of longing
That until now has been buried within me
Whomever you are
Please don’t fade away I need to hold you near to me
Let me show you
We are stars, our paths have crossed and we’ve collided
Into such a world
We’ve yet to behold
Come take my hand & together we shall find the meaning of the heavens ©
You Lit My Darkness
April 12, 1995
All of this time I thought I was alone
but you were perched on my shoulder watching and waiting
how patient you’ve been hoping that soon I’d see the light
how frustrated you were, watching me fumble my way in the dark
you kept whispering in my ear and I never stopped to listen
how could I have been so blind, I should have known you were here all along
Why did I wait so long to reach out to you
How do I begin to say I’m sorry lord
You never got tired of waiting for me to take your hand
and I’m so glad you did
I finally saw a whole new me
only through your magnificent light ©
My Lonely Spirit
April 11, 1995
I am alone
not by a request of myself
Silence is long, it brings pain to life
It seeks to engulf me but my strength somehow prevails
Is it my need to reach outside myself?
Or to slowly wallow in despair
My fear has put constraints around me
Even if I willed it , I could not free myself
This dark shadow of doubt lingers over me
Endless confusion has me enthralled
My soul is screaming
in hopes someone will hear my cry
But I am still alone
not by a request of myself ©
For Two Players Only
April 9, 1995
I am so good at playing this self-defeating game of
I will be the giver and you will be the taker
I will give you all of my heart and soul
and all you need to do is stand by my side and pretend to be interested in me
I will prostitute who I am to ensure your happiness
and when I need your affection put on the best show of your life
I will spend all my energy to promote the best you can be
and in turn act as if everything I am is important to you
I will affirm my love with countless calls to boost your ego
and when my phone doesn’t ring with enthusiasm I will know I’ve done my job
You see I am an expert at this the rules camouflage perfectly my objective
Remember It’s not whether you win or lose It’s how you play the game ©
The Dream Was Over
April 7, 1995
I could of swore I saw two people walking hand in hand
and I thought it was You and I.
I must have been mistaken, that couple looked so right together
everything about them fit like a glove.
He laughed over her silliness
She admired his strength
He loved her sexiness
She could listen to him laugh forever
But something happened along the way, one day she vanished
like she always did when things got too intense.
He found another distraction, like he always did when someone cuter caught his eye
they both didn’t know how to glue it back together.
So she went on her merry way but her heart missed him so
He managed to go on without her beside him but longed to reach out
and touch once more.
The dream was over, when they both didn’t understand why. ©
How You See Me
April 5, 1995
Please don’t move any closer
or you might see the real me.
Keep your distance
or everything we have will tarnish.
It’s getting harder to put on my mask,
I really want to show you her.
But my fear won’t let me unveil
for if you should see my other self
All my illusions come crashing down
and what will you have to cling to then
So I will hold up my mirror
and let you see what you want to see
My only hope is to love you,
before all my images shatter. ©
My Empty Heart
April 4, 1995
This place where you left me
time passed so slowly
each minute feels like years.
There’s no love left here
moment’s alone are heart wrenching
your shadow lurks everywhere.
Without even wanting to
I look and see your reflection
Oh, how I wish I could escape
Tell me Love, "Where’s this place you’ve gone?"
"Can I follow you there?"
Or shall I pretend to be invited.
However, You’ve gone
You have left me with my heart in my hands .
"Where do I take all my love for you now?"
Is your destination unknown to me
how can I ever let you know
I loved you more than I let it show. ©
Now U See Me, Now U Don’t
April 17, 1995
It is my time now
To fade into the background
Once again
I will do my disappearing act
Remember my last expression
For you will never again
Feast your eyes on my beauty
I have closed all my doorways to you
And you will not be allowed
To peer in from the outside
I will blend into the woodwork
So you will not be aware of presence
Your foolishness led to the parting of our ways
Don’t bother to look over your shoulder
You will not find me there
For I have vanished into thin air ©
Your Love
March 26, 1995
I must have really thought you loved me
and so I showed you how to throw daggers at my heart
Oh those deep brown eyes, how could I resist
and with every work you spoke you pierced my very soul
Your touch made me tremble like I never had before
and with such expertise you salted my every wound
Is that what I thought love was ?
I still remember your name so well
your first was pain
and your last was agony ©